Message in a Bottle from Managua, Nicaragua

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What’s good in your hood?

I’m writing this from one of the coolest places I’ve ever been in my life…  It’s an undisclosed compound in the truest sense of the word in the heart of Managua. When I say compound I mean an entire block that looks like nothing on the outside but everything once inside. Again, from the street it’s just like you’re going to the dead end – movies are based on reality and everything is possible.

I’m just chilling hard and eating big meals while drinking delicious fruit cocktails prepared by the maid. I’m flying out late tonight and have at least 15 hours of travel to get to my families home outside of Boston, HOORAY!! Who cares bout 15 hours, what are you doing with your next 15 hours? What have I done with my last 15 hours!?!? Where does time go… I digress…

Yesterday was real, one of the gents in the compound agreed to accompany me on my mission and let me tell you, rolling with a local is very interesting. For starters, ever heard of the “neighborhood concept” aka it’s fine walking here at night but pass the street 5 blocks away and not so much and by safe I mean for him, I’m still a “nobody” if you know what I’m saying?

We did a lot of stuff and I spent a TOTAL OF $29.18, how much would this cost back home, seriously? My teeth are so white and big that you could rip them out with surgical tools and make them into the white pieces of an over sized chess set. I have a new dentist, that lady did such a good job I couldn’t believe it was basically $12. Back home I paid $140, went twice a year and I came out feeling like cattle do after they have been branded. (so I imagine at least…) Imagine having your teeth cleaned once a month for the same price? How much healthier would your grill be?

From there we headed to the Oriental Market aka the biggest black market in Nicaragua and supposedly C. America but who knows. You can buy anything there and I mean literally anything. It’s also very dangerous for muggings, petty theft and all that jazz musika. I rolled with my friend, he told me whenever you get stuck at a jam, you gotta motor as that is where 80% of the thefts take place. Many Spanish women seemed to find the duo of a black and white guy wondering around together in a Hispanic neighborhood quite the sight.

After that we headed for a shave and a haircut, I looked like Robinson Crusoe and gave the gent a 25% tip which was still less than $1, insane? Managua is hot and I’m sweating profusely as I write this. What’s crazy is I’d rather sweat all day then be cold for 1 second a day, being cold is misery in my mind but whatever.

Check out the details of this egregious $29.xx day…

FYI – $1US = C$23.3

Bus for 2: C$5
Teeth Cleaning: C$250
Bus to Market: C$5
12 pairs of black socks: C$100
1 Pair of Quality Flip Flops: C$110
Taxi across town for 2: C$50
Haircut + Shave + 25% Tip: C$100
4 pieces of pizza & 2 bottles of water C$60

Total: 5 + 250 + 5 + 100 + 110 + 50 + 100 + 60 = 680 / 23.3 = $29.18US

I messaged this to my dad and he was like “try 400”. There is no real reason for this breakdown other than to let you know. If you want to sit your whole life in a cubicle and collect your pension that’s cool and if it makes you happy “rock on” but for those of you who don’t and want to run your own business from the web, you gotta know this stuff.

Tips hat,

P.S: HUGE Announcement June 1st, this summer is gonna “get her going”.

P.P.S: Managua is NOT, don’t be think otherwise.

P.P.S: The photo is from the plane.

Mental Note: 18 wheeler & LCI

Author: Sportestery

4 thoughts on “Message in a Bottle from Managua, Nicaragua

  1. kickass writeup! glad to see a “Managua doesn’t suck” story, as I live here and there are definitely some very good bits here and there for the enjoyment of those that dare.

    1. No doubt man, I really enjoyed Managua. It’s like many big cities in the developing world that I have visited. You need to be proactive, not reactive.

      Glad you enjoyed the post and a tip of the hat to you.

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